It is inevitable that when you deal with human beings, miscommunication is bound to happen. Whenever I get a patient complaint, I am always reminded of this image. Their version of the story is not wrong. I accept that.

But so is mine. And when I want to present my side of the story to the original complainant, I am either stuck with the third person who was not even there in the first place or met with a disregardful response. So, macam mana nak selesaikan masalah or membuat penambahbaikan if you don’t want to meet me face to face? Interestingly, the ones with the ‘loudest voice’ are females, and then they send their men to fight me, another woman. Why don’t you do the deeds yourself?

A few weeks ago, I saw a lady who came in for a fever. To cut things short, in her point of view, I am questioning her request for an MC based on my tone of voice. All of a sudden, I have a 180cm husband barging through my consultation door, demanding to see and asking why I am questioning her sickness.

To be honest, I was a bit puzzled by the accusation. It is because he was not even there in the first place to understand what went on. In my defence, I wanted to help her without knowing that there was a background story of what actually took place before she came to see me. So, it kind of makes sense as to why the husband was angry. However, I did tell the husband to invite the wife to sit together with us, so that we could get to the bottom of the problem properly. Instead, the husband said the wife was stressed and not willing to join in.

I don’t buy that.

Experience tells me that if the original complainant is not willing to sit together, that means the version of their story as told to the third person has been distorted to their advantage. Thus, they are unwilling to face the consequences of the little white lie. That’s when I knew that no matter what I say afterwards, the husband or so-called ‘negotiator’ has made up his mind on how he wishes for the outcome to be. He has no intention to correct the matter. He has no intention to ‘improve on the services’. He just wants to ventilate and blame somebody.

The public loves to threaten government services with SISPAA. Complainants would submit their issues to the platform, but with the intention of wanting the staff to be expelled. To them, that is the only justice that should be served for their problems. When in fact, counselling services, temporary suspension and transfer to another unit are also meant as ‘action taken’ to prevent escalation of the problem.

So, what happens in situations like this? When you are faced with an angry relative or patient?

I let them win. I will apologise. I will say it is my fault. I will feed their ego. I will retreat as the weak side of the party. Then I close the chapter and move on. But before I close the chapter for good, I will make one prayer to Allah. I will pray that they will be bestowed Allah’s blessing. For example, the husband or the original complainant will receive a work promotion with a bigger salary and be transferred to a place further away from where I am working. Let them be other people’s headache, or perhaps they become the receiving end of the headache that they once imposed on others.

I just made a similar prayer today for a different complainant. That this person may find peace and understanding amidst our altercation. I did offer my apologies and reconciliation by calling her back. She hung up mid-conversation. Let’s hope that she’d find a way to see through the problem and see how it was from my shoes.