Happy Birthday Haneem

They say when God gives you (a mom) a daughter, it’s His way of saying, “Hey, I thought you would need a best friend”. Of course, Allah knows best and if we trust Him enough, whatever things have been bestowed upon us are a blessing. Alhamdulillah.

Indeed, I couldn’t ask for more. So much so that I have decided to complete my family. Meaning no more pregnancies. With my current husband. Ha ha.

My daughter wanted a Frozen cake. I didn’t like the idea of having a Vanilla and Blueberry cake, but I bought it anyway since it was the cake she wanted. I am aware that it doesn’t taste delicious cause chocolate rules birthday cakes but it is her cake, so be it. I wanted to get the polkadot apam for her friends at school but the bakery was out of it. So, I bought mini banana chocolate cupcakes instead. I plan to heat them up the next morning in the oven and then layer it like a proper cake. At least her 40 friends in kindergarten can have a taste of the cupcake.

For presents, I gave my daughter a few day and night outfits. She got a stuffed unicorn from the dad. And nothing from the brother. gosh, brotherssss..

She loved it all and politely said a Thank You.

I hope in the event that Allah decides to take me away before her, she will remember me as the Mummy who celebrates her birthday with a song, a cake and a hug good night in bed.

San1 shi2 jiu3

Nowadays with the flooding of news and information on social media, one needs to filter their feed. I have been removing some profiles from my friend’s list on Facebook for reasons such as the;

  • Being inactive or have deleted their profile
  • Not having a recognisable profile pic
  • Pushy MLM gurus. I still keep the non-pushy ones cause well.. they are still friends
  • Having crossed to the dark side of medicine and is very irritating with their posts

I have recently removed a friend because he was accused of a crime. A crime involving modesty and privacy. I was appalled when I found out as he was a very unsuspecting person. In fact, he came from perfect family background. There seems to be a video of him committing the crime and the one who told me said that the resemblance was so uncanny, the location was so relevant and that it was too difficult to say that it was not him. So I removed him from my list of friends until an exact verdict comes out.

It worries me that although I think I accept Friend’s Requests from my circle who I think I know that they are good people – we can never know their true nature. What if they’re wolves under the sheep’s hide?

It is also disappointing for me as I thought I am able to read someone’s character very well. And yet I still kena kencing by patients, friends and family alike. Need to strengthen my psychological strategy. More reading. More application. More interactions.

In the meantime, let me just say a Happy Birthday to Minci. May she be spared from all the pain in the world. That she may remain benevolent and pure. That she may continue to advocate like the INFJ person that she is, always.

Happy Birthday to me

Another year has gone by. I have a lot to be thankful for.

alhamdulillah

For the family that has been given to me. I love my parents despite our differences and the things I discovered about them behind my back. Agaknya itulah ujian saya. I love my siblings. I couldn’t ask for anybody else. Eventhough sometimes they make me geram and want to give up when I want to help.

alhamdulillah

For jodoh and in laws yang baik. I don’t think I could survive having a Mak Leha as a MIL ( reference to 7 hari mencintaimu) . Memang I mintak cerai. No need to put up with the headache. The jodoh may not be perfect just as I am not perfect either. Mana lagi nak dpt laki yang tahu bini dia tak reti masak hebat2 or iron his shirts, one who could handle the kids as well too. So even though he can be a pain, I would usually lower my ego and let him win the argument or cold war, to look at the bigger picture and voodoo him in my mind move on.

alhamdulillah

For a profession. For a salary. For the ability to drive a car. In a way, I have my own money that I could spend however I want to. I can give it to my mom, to charity of my choice, to whomever that needs it more than I do. I could use it to fund my psychology studies. To eat nice food. To bring my family for holidays.

alhamdulillah

For giving me another year to look forward to. Maybe I will get to go for umrah or hajj next year. I have been hinting Tabung Haji through my online deposits activity descriptions. Things like ‘saya nak pergi haji”, ” doakan saya dpt pegi haji”. HA HA HA. Mohon sgt bila print statement nampak benda tuh. Pretty please..

For my birthday, I don’t need streaming wishes or forced Facebook wall wishes. I am happy with the personalized wishes I’ve been getting. I don’t need big parties either. I am happy enough with normal wishes from close friends, intimate meals or small group makan2.

Husband’s 35th Birthday

Husband turned 35 last week. I did not know what to get him as a gift so I just bought him a cake from Italy Bakery situated at Jalan Kenanga. It was a very low key celebration this year – we can’t go out to dine, much less going on a vacation or to the movies.

TQ husband for existing in my life as it has undeniably gotten better. It is not perfect but it is better. I couldn’t imagine someone like yourself being so patient spending your lifetime (insyaAllah) with me. I hope we have a good ending to our lives here in dunia and a wonderful journey together till its due.

Ninie is 1

When I carried her in my womb, I had an inkling that this could be a girl but it wasn’t really confirmed until I finally saw her during my Caesarean section. She is turning 1  years old today. Some say she is a spitting image of my mom. To me, she is a mixture of my face and my husband’s.

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Haneem meaning penuh kasih sayang

Raising a girl is more than just putting pretty clothes on her. It is a lot of hard work from a moms perspective. I am not saying raising a boy is easy, it’s just that the ‘syllabus’ is different. LOL. If I could pre-programme Ninie’s virtues – my top 3 would be Kind, Generous and Intelligent.

Kind so she would not say or do things that could harm someone elses feelings or well being. That she would choose her words carefully and react accordingly. So she would always be pleasing to Allah, to us and those who love her.

Generous so she can share if she has the means to do so. To be thoughtful of other peoples plight. And in order to give more, she would strive to have enough in the first place. And work hard for it. Which is closely linked to my final trait.

Intelligent. A young lady with a sharp mind can never go wrong. With that brain of hers, InsyaAllah she is going to use it for the benefit of her family, the ummah and humanity as a whole.

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But these virtues do not just come by on its own. It will depend on the whole village especially the parents to lay down those bricks to shape out what type of person their children will be. A daughter should have the best of what her parents can provide and this puts me in a big, big shoe. If you read the news nowadays or just scroll down the newsfeed on Facebook, there is a lot of crimes, misdemeanour, liberalism and hatred in the current society that one cannot help feeling worried for their family members. Me too, included.

Which is why it is important to include ALllah in your daily life, your decision making etc. For it is He that will listen to you and guide you through life. We can never know the future but I pray that all will be well biiznillah.I can already imagine the hurdles that Ninie  will be going through as a young girl, a teenager and later a young adult. I have had uncertainties as whether I could be the best role model for her.

Reflecting on the latter, perhaps that is why Allah bestowed upon me a daughter. We all have our own pathways in getting closer to Allah. Some through wealth, others a good career, several through building a family, a few through Death or predicaments in everyday life. Mine is through Haneem (ninie). Knowing me, who wants to be the best version of myself to both Hazeeq and Haneem – InsyaAllah, I would take steps to improve myself as not only a mum, but a muslimah as a whole.

I want them to see me who uses the talent/skills Allah give me towards doing something useful. I want them to know that I care about not only our own family but other people who needs help as well. I want them to see that I use good words in my conversations and that I always smile  the company of people, even amongst those I don’t really like. I want them to learn how to manage their emotions, their time and monetary resources by example. In short, I want them to be proud of me as a mum.

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That they would confide in me when they encounter problems. They would shower me with endless hugs and kisses. That they know I am not just a mom, but I am also a doctor who knows how to have a good time. ha ha. Above all, I want them to pray for my well being always as evidence that they sayang me a lotttttt.

Happy birthday Ninie. I hope you grow up to be a beautiful lady loved by Allah and his ummah. InsyaAllah.