You can always count on the users on Facebook to extract interesting videos from Tiktok for a bawang/dissecting discussion. Recently, there was a video of a lady having a casual talk with her partner in the car. Her boyfriend was making a comment about how he wouldn’t approach this particular girl (probably on social media) because he felt that she was out of his league. The lady responded with something like, “Are you insinuating that I am below her level?” to which the guy replied that it’s got nothing to do with her being at a lower level but was unable to bring forward his points in a better way. The lady probably proceeded to post the initial conversation on the tiktok and got a response from it because what happened next was that the couple broke up. The guy sent a few messages stating that she probably deserved someone better because ‘people’ were saying that she should. I would think these are fellow tiktok users as well. Then he requested that all the things he gave her throughout their relationship be returned. The young lady obliged as evidenced by her tiktok video.

Now, there are a few things in the video that raises questions. Honestly, I was intrigued.

• One : Do people nowadays just keep their phones in record mode all the time? Like every single, intimate moment that you share with your significant other? Especially on very sensitive matters?
• Two : I am interested to know how long has this relationship been going on and what this couple do for a living. Because…
• Three : The gifts this lady received are items I consider quite costly for someone in a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. I wouldn’t expect this kind of gift from my husband-then-boyfriend even though we were both working as doctors. This goes on to my next point.
• Four : League shouldn’t be perceived as level/caste although the concept is somewhat similar. It can be however be understood as a circle.

Point One

Inevitably this could be true. It gets even weird when you see people cry on video in response to a sad or traumatic event. I am intrigued by the thought process. Has pressing the record button become so instinctive that in any event, the thumb would automatically go to the camera app? Or do they hold back their tears for a while, turn on the camera and continue the motion? I would understand making a video talking about feelings or thoughts after crying as a method of processing the emotional situation. But to record it while having an emotional breakdown?

I am not saying that people who are doing it are dumb. I just want to understand the thought process. Are they genuine or is this a variant of narcissism or part of being a pathological liar? What consequences are we going to be looking at in many years to come? How will society be at the time?

Even during a clinic session, I find that patients like to keep their video on although it has been made clear that all consultations are confidential. Are they planning to post the conversation on social media as a background voice for their videos? Are they planning to sue the clinic for something?

Point Two

The couple seem very comfortable with each other because the guy was able to talk about the league issue. However, like any relationship, regardless of how many years, they need to explore the many forms of communication and the type of world they are living in. This is after all the world of social media and heading strongly toward artificial intelligence. I find it is good that they are able to have an open discussion with each other although probably due to experience, one side is quick to jump to a conclusion and the other party is unable to carry the argument in a positive direction.

Point Three

I saw at least two shoe boxes, a digital pen? and god knows what else in the snapshot of the gifts she received from her partner. Clearly, this couple is in a different league compared to me because they speak a different gift language.

During my own courtship period, I remembered going on a lot of meal dates and being given a watch for my birthday. To me, that was appropriate for our type of relationship. Of course, I have friends who go on holiday trips with their boyfriends. Then there are some whose boyfriend buys them branded items for special occasions and such because it is something that they can do and afford as a couple. It is their love language.

This brings me to the next point.

Point Four

She is not in my league.

The guy said to the lady that it is not a level thing – which I believe is true. It is a social circle thing. For example, I find Min Yoongi attractive but would I pursue him? Of course not – because he is from a different league. Although our love language is coffee, he speaks Kimchi, and music and raps hundreds of syllables in a minute. I speak nasi goreng, diabetes and talk like a mouse.

THEN…

Does that mean my husband is below his level? Again. Of course not– we just walk in a different social circle. This is probably what the guy was trying to say when he said ‘why would I even want to try?’ but unfortunately has been misconstrued by his partner. Maybe he couldn’t find the right words to describe his point and since their conversation was recorded and uploaded to social media – other ‘people’ decided to give their emotional two cents and basically ignited the fire in their relationship.

If the lady had taken the moment to clarify and process the meaning of the conversation instead of putting it on a digital platform, this love story would have probably had a different ending. Anyway, they seem like a nice couple and I really hope that they will find a way to make amends. OK?