Category Archives: Ponderings & Personal Development

The power of social media journalists

Posted in Current Events by

The marital dispute involving Zahnita, a former Malaysian model, has recently come to light. After 20 years of marriage, she filed a police report for domestic violence, leading to her husband being detained by the authorities. What saddens me is how popular news portals and social media platforms have chosen to frame the narrative. While it’s understandable that sensational stories drive engagement and shares online, I believe more could be done to educate the public about the broader issues surrounding this case. Better still, they should leave out the children from this. We’ve all been teenagers. We’ve been in that stage of life where we think we know everything. Yet, we should be able to realize that whatever we knew as teenagers was far from the reality of things once we reach adulthood.

For example;

  • A focus on what entails domestic violence (DV). DV is not just physical assaults. Sexual, psychological and financial are also part of DV. However, the public needs to know the criteria of circumstances that qualify for their situations to be perceived as DV. Then, show them the way to how they could get help.
  • Explain what Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is from a medical professional point of view. It’s better than having netizens sharing their opinions on what NPD is based on ChatGPT and then passing it off as their own thoughts. I used to have an opinion of what Personality Disorder is. However, once I learned properly about it, I noted that it was not necessarily Kevin Wendell (from SPLIT). You would need a medical professional trained in Psychiatry to assess and confirm the diagnosis.
  • Single parents and survival strategies.
  • Family counselling therapies. It’s benefits and information about facilities that provide them. People tend to think that counselling is just ‘talking about your problems’. Counselling is a transformative journey of self-discovery and healing, where compassion meets guidance to empower individuals to navigate life’s challenges and embrace their fullest potential.

Instead, we find ourselves reading a teenager’s claim that “nothing happened,” with some people readily accepting her words. In reality, abuse often occurs behind closed doors but can also manifest publicly, including through the psychological torment inflicted via social media. Disagreements in a marriage happen, but to abuse is to betray the very foundation of love and trust that a partnership is built upon.

And now we are talking about pie recipes? Seriously?

My Final Year Project (FYP) for Psychology is complete

Posted in Adult Learning, Ponderings & Personal Development by

When I first started, it was difficult to envision the end. Eventually, I did. All I had to do was take it one step at a time, holding the hand of my supervisor.

I studied motivation among the staff at my clinic. The biggest hurdle when conducting any study at a KKM facility is that I need to get approval from the Medical Research and Ethics Committee (MREC). That means having to set up a National Medical Research Register (NMRR) account and doing another set of study protocols based on what I have already written for Chapters 1 to 3 for my Open University Malaysia (OUM) subject. Once the study protocol was written and the relevant early permission was granted from my superior at the workplace and the district health office, I had to submit these documents to NMRR. I had to revise my protocol and my consent forms twice. It was disheartening at first because I was running out of time. I initially wanted to complete my FYP in 2 semesters, but I do not have control over the technical aspects of other things. This became my second hurdle.

I learned to accept that some things are just out of our control. The things I could control at the time were my reading and understanding of the topic through literature reviews. I also tried my best to perfect my chapters. I used a thesaurus a lot because the words I used were, at times, less academic. Even then, everything just comes together. The ethical approval came just in time when I wanted to start my data collection.

The data collection period was exhausting. I had to transcribe on my own. I had to squeeze in the tasks of analysing, transcribing, and reading the data between the times of the early morning, after work, and over the weekend. Writing up the report was an equally exhausting stage as I tried to make sense of what my results were. It got to the point when my sympathetic responses went into overdrive mode. However, the euphoria of being absorbed in the process and fully understanding what I wanted to achieve kept me going. There were certainly some things I initially overlooked, which just underscores how vital it is to have an engaged SV. I’ve had my sights set on this SV ever since my semester studying social psychology. She was one of the first people I considered when we were selecting our SVs, and it turned out to be an excellent decision. You can genuinely feel the positive energy of an exceptional SV radiating from her. A hallmark of a great SV is her ability to guide me through complex topics, even outside her field, ensuring that external readers can easily grasp the concepts.

Towards the deadline, there was a lot of ping-pong going on with our emails but we persevered. I felt a huge relief when I submitted my report to OUM. On the day itself.

Is this the end of my FYP? Technically yes, but remember the NMRR and MREC I mentioned earlier. Now I have to submit a report to them. I hope I can use my OUM report instead of re-doing it with a different format. I will check on it soon.

HIV Programme – a rotten tomato rating to myself

Posted in All in a days work, Ponderings & Personal Development by

I wanted to host my HIV programme in a different format this year. Instead of another aerobics session with a public talk, I made it into an organised CME session. The turnout was bad as I overlooked certain things that could have made a difference. Less than 10 people attended the talk.

  • NO hype. There was no hype built around the programme. Hence, people were not excited to attend the session and just cited ‘being busy’ or ‘patient ramai’ as an excuse. I could do better by explaining what World AIDS Day is and emphasising the importance of healthcare worker’s support.
  • Existing HCWs do not see their role in HIV care. To them, it is a distant thing managed purely by myself, Dr Minci and members of my team. While it is true that we coordinate patient’s care, other healthcare professionals are equally important in managing these cases.
  • Team spirit. It is noticeably lacking as compared to my NCD team. Perhaps it is predominantly male making them less enthusiastic about the frills of any celebration.

Anyway, InsyaAllah I can do better in 2025. I will be having a new co-champion. I hope that everything goes well. Amin.

Ina Naim, Selamat Pengantin Baru

Posted in Current Events by

As much as I am not a fan of Ina Naim and her late husband’s parenting techniques and lifestyle, I feel that there is nothing wrong with her entering marriage life again. After all, it was a choice she made at her own will with her kid’s best interest in mind. It is not a crime to find love and comfort in the arms of another man after the passing of her husband.

I was honestly flabbergasted at the comments left by other women on her wedding news. Things like, “How could you forget your own husband already”? or “You are being selfish, you should think about your children!”

Ina Naim is a mother of 4. Before this, she had no income of her own and depended heavily on her husband for matters of everyday living. To have Khairul, her new husband, in her life is a huge step as they have to come to terms with the changes that will happen with this union. I really hope this man can be a great father figure to her children and that Ina Naim will be showered with much love and respect as a wife and mother.

I mean, shouldn’t we all wish the best for everybody? A little bit of thought and kindness goes a long way.

Making informed decisions based on the choices we have

Posted in Ponderings & Personal Development by

Perhaps we can start with food.

Every year there will be parents passing comments on Facebook about how displeased they are when their kids receive junk food as goodies during the end-of-year class party. The way I see it, if you have been feeding your child with mostly quality food for the whole year, then I believe that even if the child receives those goodies, he/she will know which ones she could indulge in more, and which ones to space out in terms of its consumption frequency.

Ramadan is coming soon. I think that is a good month to train ourselves as adults and our kids to make better meal choices during Sahur and Iftar. Malaysia has a very food-orientated scene during Ramadan. The bazaar keeps popping up more than the year before. I would expect the prices would be freaking expensive as well. Sadly, this is where food wastage happens as well. I feel that as Malaysian Muslims, we need to focus on sweetening the ibadat component of Ramadan.

Food should be back to what it is – a form of sustenance to feed the soul and body. Not as a means to satisfy cravings per se. Having said that, I am not against the idea of organising Iftar to form meaningful connections with family and friends. If it is well-planned and promotes togetherness, then that is also a form of Ibadat.

The life we live is based on the choices we make along the way. Make better food choices. Live a better lifestyle. That is what I am aiming for in 2025.